“Excuse Me, You’re Standing In Your Pizza:” The Fine Art of Suggesting Wealth Dynamics Coaching
Who remembers the movie, “Thelma and Louise?”
In this 1991 crime drama, there’s a scene where Thelma’s husband, Darryl, is confronted by an FBI agent in his home. The agent informs him that Louise’s car was spotted peeling out from the scene of a shooting — and Thelma may have been in the car too.
Darryl is speechless. He doesn’t even notice where he’s standing. “Excuse me,” the agent tells Darryl. “You’re standing in your pizza!”
Sometimes, something that is glaringly obvious to an outsider might not be noticeable to the person who is absorbed by an overwhelming situation. Sticky family dynamics can be like this. Sometimes we don’t know what to do to make our family relationships better. The problems seem intractable.
Significant financial wealth doesn’t erase our problems. On the contrary, it often leads to strained relationships and feeling adrift in the world.
Imagine that you have a friend who is under a lot of family or life stress. Maybe it’s related to money. You would really like to help them, and you think that they might benefit from Wealth Dynamics coaching. They haven’t asked for your help, and you’re having trouble bringing it up.
Here’s some ideas to start the conversation.
1. Acknowledge your friendship.
Begin by reminding the person that you appreciate your relationship with them. “I’ve known you for a really long time and I appreciate that we can talk to each other about hard things. I really care about you.”
2. Recognize the pain they’re in.
Let the person know that you truly see them. “I can see how painful your family situation is for you, and I have been thinking about what might be helpful. There are coaches that help people work through situations like yours.”
3. Ask permission.
“If you’re interested, I could tell you more about that.” Give the person a chance to opt-out. Then, if appropriate, share more details.
4. If given permission, share what you know about Wealth Dynamics.
Suggest a facilitated conversation. “There are people who address these very complicated interpersonal dynamics in a private and totally confidential manner. It’s not therapy, it’s coaching.”
- They work with individuals, couples and families to address the impact of wealth on relationships, as well as life in general.
- They’re focused on positive communication around hard to discuss topics like finance/money, legacies and values.
- Families who take the time to work on their wealth dynamics experience greater connection and cohesiveness.
When a family can communicate their thoughts and feelings openly, and actively work together to encourage and support individual and collective growth, everyone benefits. This is the goal of Wealth Dynamics coaching.
It can feel awkward to insert yourself into someone’s personal affairs. We hope this post is helpful. If you have further questions, please feel free to reach out to us at info@graddha.com. We would love to help.
